Finding joy

Inflicted with deep restlessness; 
I realise a desire for something 
eternal in being;
to put in plain words.
Words simply cannot: 
they fail to express.
I try my very best, 
but I am unable to:
I fail to communicate.
But I know a knowing;
very true and trustworthy;
which never fails;
who always whispers:
there is that cosmic unity between us, 
which nothing,
no one,
can take away.
No one can,
for I have beheld true joy.
I have beheld true joy.

By Emmanuel Johnson

The situation of the cancelled

In the obscurity of this island,
I find surrounded, isolated clutters
of thought and intent.

I have been rejected
by those who once claimed to care.
I am trying to connect to the best of me.
But I recognise the war waging on the inside. 
This something within,
has been decided as the whole of me.
When in truth, it is only a fraction.
I have had plenty of time to reflect,
and I acknowledge all of my ways.
Now, in the final analysis
and dawning of this day,
I am compelled to ask myself the question: 
what becomes of the cancelled?

By Emmanuel Johnson

There came a time

Searching for something;
unaware I was and what it was.
Watching days pass like shifting shadows; 
viewing time in front, side, and back.
Looking vaguely for long,
being misled by false acuity.
The links disconnected and then I saw,
my severed paradigm.
Would you talk to me, my dear paradigm? 
How I need you now, my dear paradigm.
Your love stayed strong, even when I faltered. 
And now I see,
that secret understanding between us,
which you tried to make me see earlier.
Oh how illusioned I was,
my redemptive paradigm.

By Emmanuel Johnson

Trips, memory and imagination

Straight in; not a long trip, 
I feel it substantially.
Not long after,
another trip.

Fast paced service,
dizzy delivery.
I'm speeding down an unknown lane, 
going somewhere I've never been.
I'm not alone; 
a very familiar companion 
by my side,
and my mind,
and in here too.

I arrive, I am alive,
I feel it substantially.
I get to see you again,
I am happy;
I feel it substantially.
This place has a feel to it,
I spend considerable time with you in it. 
But not for long.
I leave, but
I get to see you again.
Oh how you've changed,
things are quite different now.
I feel it deeply.

By Emmanuel Johnson

One thing truly never left

This new journey of mine,
I have treaded; still treading.
Treading never ending.
Well, so it seems.
My days have been favoured coatings, 
flavoured blisters in my mind,
ever pushing. Filters I now find,
ever reminding, like I ever forgot. 
Well, maybe I did.
Filters crying out; every now and then; 
never forget why you parted;
this is all you truly wanted.
To live the life in the count,
and walk the walk on the mount. 
Living the life in the count,
walking the walk on the mount.

By Emmanuel Johnson

Morning sessions

This regret of mine, oh this regret,
words not said, feelings not felt.
I try to be the best that I can be,
my effort laid to waste by this trip.
I wish I could slip to retrace time.
I was alive, in the moment, but empty now.
You filled me, but all I am now is hollow;
a hole where my heart was, in this time apart.
Regrets persist, I know I must, let go.
But to lose this feeling, this sadness, is to lose you.
To choose you or do I choose me?

By Adetiloye, Maybelle, Emmanuel Johnson

Everything is meaningless

Till and toil the soil,
for you never know what you might find.
Till and toil the soil,
toil and sorrow till sun up.
Sorrow for tomorrow, for now, then later.
Then later, much later, comes the smiles that waver,
pain for so little gain; was it worth it? I ask.
Down the road, not far, I know a thing that sparks.
Not too far I promise, a gem that sparks.
Though life doesn’t seem a walk in the park,
The feel I feel, is what I must lay.
Because life comes with it swirls and whirls,
and in the midst of the wind and grind; some fun I must find.

By Maybelle, Emmanuel Johnson, Adetiloye

Revelation in thine

Running down the isle of hope,
I fall beneath the murky waters of doubt.
Trying to hold onto the steady branches of faith,
I slip into the warmth of you.
Holding onto the tendrils of grace,
bewildered by the sprite of your face.
Your life, your all, I feel your everything;
your wings beneath my feet lifting me high,
above the skies, above the tides.
And on the day, in time and space
when salvation shall come,
I shall behold your love.

By Emmanuel Johnson, Adetiloye, Maybelle.

On time

Here now,
gone then, but now.
My vigour covers my eyes like a veil
and suffocates me like thick smoke.
Yet, I walk firmly; my eyes covered still, 
with a wide smile on my face;
till I stumble and fall.
I was blinded all along.
How did I not realise this?
I contemplate.
I repent.
There is no repentance without forsaking, 
so I shed off old skin.
Only now do I see
I am truly alive;
what a glorious occasion!

By Emmanuel Johnson

Madness or the surreal grandeur of love

I finally made it out the madness outside; 
with a hot cup of tea in my hand,
I take a seat, I get comfortable.
I look away from my book,
what do I see?
A man and woman in love.
He contemplates, then says to her: 
when you think of me,
I wish that
you shall see me
for all I tried and failed to be.
She says to him:
on these streets cemented
with memories of us
shall I walk with you day by day.
I take a sip and say to myself:
I finally made it to the madness inside.

By Emmanuel Johnson